Rolando “Roly” Puerto
1985 Buick Regal
Sometimes getting pushed to the edge means the only recourse is to push back. When an animal gets pushed into a corner, the situation can become very “problematic” for the aggressor, and this beast of a 1985 Buick Regal became just that. Rolando “Roly” Puerto initially built the G-Body hopper to hurt feelings in the streets, and while it did turn heads, unfortunately, it did so for all the wrong reasons. Technically, the car was great, but the Buick’s appearance left much to be desired. Trash talk became louder than whispers and soon after, the streets labeled the car “a bucket,” Roly knew it was time to prove them wrong. What he did next left everyone in awe; pictures of Roly and his father chopping up the yellow beast into pieces hit the internet faster than a sprinter off the starting blocks. He received countless calls of folks in disbelief, expressing their discontent with what they had witnessed. The shock of the drastic actions in the photos may have disturbed many, but to him, it was just the work necessary to transform the “bucket” into what would soon become “The King of Florida.”
The aspiring hopper and his father caught a glimpse of a Buick Regal on sale for $300, and knew that they couldn’t pass up the deal. Once they purchased the car, they set a goal; in three months, they would have the baddest hopper on the streets. The quick deadline was brought on because the picnic to crown the hopping title of “The King of Florida” was just three months away. The skeptics thought that this was an impossible goal, but Roly and his dad saw it as a time for father and son to show everyone that hard work and dedication can accomplish anything.
The duo brought the car home and immediately took the body off of the frame. Once off the frame, Willy and “Negro,” from Hoppers Hydraulics, were called on to prepare the car for the abuse it was to endure. To accomplish this, the pair used one quarter inch of metal, which was heated, bent, stretched, turned, and molded around the frame until it was smooth as an egg. Willy and “Negro” finished everything off with a custom 4-link and rear-end, and Roly was quite satisfied with the end result. With the reinforcement finished, it was onto the next aspects of the build.
Having the suspension taken care of by Hoppers Hydraulics, Roly and Mario quickly took care of the bodywork and paint, using a striking PPG-signature Red throughout the car. Once the G-Body was painted, the services of the incredible “Clay” Holderness were called upon, and he concocted one of his signature masterpieces, using silver-leaf and pinstriping. With the paint taken care of, the car was ready to be assembled back onto the frame. Hoppers Hydraulics again worked their magic, with Willy and “Negro” blessing the car with three Black Magic pumps, Adex dumps, and 12 batteries. Meeting their deadline, Roly and his father were ready to unleash their beast on the streets. The end result of the three-month build was 82 inches of smack-down lying; back bumper smashing, ego-crushing fun for this GoodTimer.
Ever proud of his Regal, Roly sends this message out to his haters: “Line it up and bring it! You can catch me on the beach, ass up in front of Fat Tuesdays, or you can see me on the back bumper serving you up. Pick your poison, because I am “Problematic!” Roly sends a special thanks out to his Mom, Dad, Gaby, Juan, Willie, Negro, Nino, Yoshi, Alex, Big Roly, and everyone who made this build possible.